I’ve been in a decluttering period for a few years. I never want to grow out of it. Even though I still love to shop and acquire things for my home, I am more focused. I am more aware of what I want and what I need. I am more willing to invest in a long-term solution and have more satisfaction in my belongings. Slowly the shopping habit has been fading and I can use things for what they are intended to primarily.
In understanding how I had let items take a higher place in my life than they should have, I started seeing things as things, and not as a potential or high-value treasure when it isn’t. Let me explain myself a little better. I kept (still working on matching my closet to my reality) items thinking that one day I was going to need it. One day all of a sudden I was going get invited to a gala and needed a gown. I would have to go to a funky outing and need a matching outfit. I still believe that there are basic items that you need in your wardrobe so it can be balanced, but honestly, those are a handful ( just in case you are wondering, for me those are a white button down, black slacks, a nice pair of jeans, a black dress, and a dark neutral blazer). Those days rarely ever come! Last time I wore a long dress was for a wedding four years ago. I had time to go shopping for it. Something else to add to this is that when you stop shopping to shop, you will probably have the money for last minute expenses.
Secondly, I held on to things because I hadn’t used it to the last bone. I thought that it needed to have a hole or not fit me any longer before it left my life. “I paid good money for it!” “It is worth something!” First off I am not growing and stay within a weight range so things will always fit. I also have so much that I wouldn’t be able to break most of my items. Finally, just because it has some worth, it doesn’t mean that it has worth to me.
I was stuck with a scarcity mindset.
I thought that I needed to get my last dime from everything I or someone else spent money on. I also thought that in case of an emergency I wouldn’t be able to cover my need. Lies. Like I said above, those unexpected events just don’t happen. If they ever do happen, I live in a city where I have access to almost anything I would need. Clothes and things in general are not meant to last forever. Tastes change, life needs change, careers change, so will my wardrobe. If I outgrew something, it is fine. I might not have used it as I thought I should, but the purpose was fulfilled. Now, was that purpose to make me feel better? Was it a lesson that I should not wear that color? Was it to learn to plan better? The purpose is not always to use it as intended.
When you shop or keep because you like it or because you are emotional or out of pressure, you let the thing take some hold of you. If you don’t take over, you keep thinking that you need something when you don’t. Holding on to what we don’t need and truly don’t want as clutch to cover something that we need to face or is simply not true will keep us in the dark, weak and continuously searching for our drug. The search will never stop and neither will the keeping habit.
Let go of the lie that you don’t have enough. Let go of the lie that you can’t face your emotions. Let go of the lie that if you don’t have it, you are wrong. It will take time and it will take effort. Your mind will thrive without the additional burdens. Let it.